by Kelsey Vasquez

If you are a parent to a preschooler, you’ve probably thought about screen time. What works for your family may be different from another, and that’s okay. Here are a few thoughts that have helped me find the balance that works for my family:

The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends no screen time for children under age two and limiting screens to one hour a day of high-quality programs for children ages two to five years. Children under the age of five, do not need screens to facilitate or enhance their development (so ignore the marketing that pushes those on parents). However, as a parent of three children under the age of five, I can honestly say that sometimes parents of young children do need screen time to maintain their sanity. I have often chosen to put on a show that will capture my children’s attention long enough so that I can safely shower, prepare dinner, or finish a task. And that’s okay. I have not ruined my children by exposing them to a screen before age two. The key word here is choice. When we offer our children a screen, we are making a choice each time and we can be mindful about what works best for our family in each situation. 

Children develop through experiences utilizing all of their senses, which is a main reason why screen time is not a necessary aspect of development. A screen can not replace the face-to-face interactions of a loving caregiver or mimic the intricacies of unstructured free play that support the whole development from strengthening muscles to emotional intelligence.  Overuse of screentime is linked to poor sleeping habits, behavioral issues, language and social skill delays, and struggles with attention. 

We are social beings at heart and thrive in relationships. Young children need ample opportunities to secure their attachment with loved ones, experience face-to-face interactions, move and take healthy risks with their bodies. Brain research shows that a child’s emotional limbic systems take center stage in development before their cognitive frontal cortex. This means, preschoolers need to build a strong foundation of social emotional development for future success. High quality programs can help support this development when the choice for screen time is necessary. A few favorite programs in our house include: Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood, Clifford the Big Red Dog, Super Why, Blaze and the Monster Machines, Peg + Cat, and Rusty Rivets. 

Brain research is also important to consider for the types of screens we offer. Passive screen time, for example, would describe watching television or a movie. Active screen time would be for playing games or using apps on a tablet. Often, active screen time is considered more educational because children are actively participating and engaging with the content. However, active screen time is also more addictive since it produces the dopamine release that encourages repeat behavior. Have you heard of the screen time zombies? (Or, even worse, experienced it first hand?) Young children can often go into a zombie-like state when pulled away from the tablet as their brain “comes down” from the dopamine release and craving. Since a child’s brain is still developing, these chemicals can have a much greater impact on their development in areas such as impulse control, delayed gratification, and self-regulation. 

Personally, I prefer passive screen time for children under age seven for a few reasons. First, children are further away from the screen when watching television versus using a tablet which is better for their developing eyes. Also, if siblings are involved, there has to be some negotiation of content when deciding what is watched which supports communication skills, problem-solving, and conflict resolution. Lastly, since watching a tv is less private than watching a tablet, it helps me keep an eye on what my children are watching and I’m less likely to lose track of how long they have been watching since I can see and hear the program. 

So what’s the bottom line? Screens are not going away and they will be a part of your child’s life in some way, at some point. Decide the balance that works for your family and help your child practice finding that balance as well. Share your thinking out loud so that they can benefit from your thought process and better understand the limits being set in place. Remember, your child does not need screen time for their development (so ignore the marketing!) and keep in mind what they do need to make sure screen time is not inhibiting what is most important - quality, uninterrupted, unstructured play and face-to-face interaction and attachment to loving caregivers. 

Helpful Links on Screen Time:

https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/childrens-health/in-depth/screen-time/art-20047952

https://www.zerotothree.org/resource/screen-time-recommendations-for-children-under-six/